Cheering for the home team?
My son played football for the high school while I worked as head coach in the town next door.
I always felt like something of a cheat when I secretly cheered him on even while leading my own team to beat his.
Sometimes, his mother didn’t talk to me for a week until the ache of the loss left the family.
So you can say I felt great relief when he went on to college, played sports on teams I could root for more openly.
When he came to me after 9/11 saying he had enlisted in the Army, I was appalled.
It was almost as if we had taken a step back.
Now I’m not saying that I ever rooted for our enemies in Iraq. I just always felt bad about the war.
It was just another Vietnam to me, the government hiding behind patriotism in order to promote some corporate agenda I couldn’t believe in.
And to see my son as an instrument in a corporate take over of Iraq hit me hard.
He pleaded for my approval, telling me that “They” attacked us.
The term “They” always seemed vague when used as an excuse for war, and I no more believed Iraq was behind 9/11 than I believed the Bay of Token attack LBJ used as an excuse to send our kids to die in Vietnam.
But pride in my son had to make up for my doubts.
I went him off with my blessing, feeling worse than I ever did about football.
More than once during his high school, I thought of resigning my coaching position just to relieve the conflict.
But what could I resign now to overcome the feeling I was being disloyal to him by hating the war in which he fought?
And how is a man to make up to a boy like that when later a sergeant comes to my door to tell me my son just died in combat?
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